Online Recovery Programme Session 11

A New Way of Learning

Refresh

Here is your opportunity to refresh your memory about the exercises that you will have tackled so far.

If you are anything like us, you may have skipped a couple of them because they did not seem relevant at the time. When we skip a step it’s a bit like making a cake and leaving out the eggs.

All too often the reason for this is that we aren’t in the right place mentally and physically to do them. It can highlight what we are resisting.

The other thing that often happens is we find something that works and stop doing it when we feel better. Have you ever been to the doctor with a sore throat or some kind of infection and got pretty quick results and then found yourself forgetting to take the antibiotics once the pain has gone?

With M.E. this can be a dangerous strategy - we can’t afford to stop doing the things that improve how we feel.

Re-enforce

This is vital because it is all about behaviour change. At school or on a training course, quizzes or exams are there to check that we have absorbed new information and we usually revise in preparation for them.

In this case, you will be delighted to know there is no exam!

Did You Know?

It has been discovered that we may have to hear something up to seven times for that information to become internalised and embedded.

Permanent behaviour change only happens when new thought patterns have formed deep grooves into our neural pathways in the brain. So as you will have gleaned from the content in the past few weeks, M.E. recovery is dependent on making significant changes.

It is crucial to release what is causing your symptoms. New ideas and behaviours are suggested and sown like little seeds in your brain. They need to be nurtured until you embrace them fully. When this happens, you will incorporate new choices that serve your recovery, and your health will blossom as a result.

Sounds easy, doesn’t it?

The truth is we are creatures of habit and we slip back into what is normal for us – even if it has a negative consequence. This is what causes the relapse and remission cycle.

Luckily for me I recognised my body was protecting me and I learned very quickly that I would never do that again: and I haven’t. I am very vocal now. I can say 'No' to even the most persuasive person.

A good ethos is: ‘No, I am not prepared to jeopardise my health, no matter how tempting the opportunity is.’

Be very selective where you invest your energy. There will always be someone out there who will push you – in my experience those people often take very poor care of their own health and wellbeing.

This is your test.

Remember, it is not them who will have to deal with all the misery of being bed-bound or sofa-bound is it? It’s you.

So why did I say yes? I was talking to a dear friend who had lost her home after going bankrupt. She said since that terrible time she had not gone even one penny overdrawn. She now has her new home and is super-vigilant about her finances.

I realise now that I had only accepted I needed to change my behaviour at surface level. Now I have internalised it, nothing will induce me to compromise my health.

A Recoverer's Relapse Story

It’s so easy, when you start feeling a bit better to stop doing the things that actually got you to where you are now.

I remember that when I stopped writing in my journal, I didn’t have as much balance in my life as I needed. Something I also noticed was if there was something bothering me, something emotional, or a situation I didn’t know how to deal with, I would sometimes end up working and keeping myself busy to avoid facing up to the changes that needed to be made.

I would get so involved in what I was doing, I didn’t really have time to think about it. At the time it felt like it was helping, but in the end, it affected my health again.

This is something I really have to keep an eye on, as there are always going to be situations that are not easy to deal with in life, or things you are not sure how to resolve, but by hiding them behind being busy made things worse for me.

It can lead to a relapse, if you are overdoing it and not dealing with the issue you are avoiding. So make sure you are aware of this, if it is something that you do.

You may avoid it in other ways but just become aware of how you don’t deal with issues that need your attention, as more often than not, once they are dealt with, they were never as bad as you imagined then to be in the first place.

So remember that your emotions can really drive your behaviours, so be aware of them and let them in, let yourself feel whatever it is you need to feel and then make the changes you need to make.

Trust me, it makes all the difference.

Top Tips Roundup

Which of the following are you doing? Remember to celebrate successes so far.

Mind

• What are your feel-good CDs? Have you played them recently?
• Are you allowing your brain time off with no TV?
• Are you using scented candles or an oil burner?
• Have you read You Can Heal Your Life?
• Have you read The Secret?
• Have you watched the birds outside?
• Have you sat out in the sunshine?

Body

• Taking your temperature
• What supplements are you taking? How about CO enzyme Q10?
• What are you doing to exercise? Walking, stretching, yoga?
• What changes have you made to your diet?
• Have you cut down on exposure to computers and mobile phones?

Spirit

• Are you using your daily meditation?
• Are you bathing by candlelight?
• Did you write to someone you feel lucky to have in your life and tell them why?
• Have you started your happy days scrapbook?
• Did you watch someone who lives in the moment?

External World

• Notice what others say about your symptoms - has it changed?
• How does the room you spend time in look? Did you make any plans for it or have you changed it at all?
• Did you get some help de-cluttering?
• Have you read Clear Your Clutter?
• How much television are you watching? Have you cut down?

How Many Did You Do?

It's time to celebrate your success. Imagine if you never started this programme - all the seeds of health that you have sown would not be in place to germinate and blossom to health.

Re-enforce your good feeling and reward yourself. Call a friend and tell them about your progress or arrange something that makes you feel really good. You deserve it.

New Top Tip for This Week

Revisit the course content regularly. You will notice things that you may have skimmed over before.

Write your story now.

It will have new chapters as you progress even more. It is important to see where you are and it could be the beginning of your book!